CAFCASS Experiences

[SoulDad]

Yes I've also heard this but so far she's only been mainly vocal on inconvenience for them and she also thinks the judge won't like that I have a girlfriend (which I denied those allegations).
Yes I see the kids every weekend from Friday night to Sunday night and half the holidays.
I have representation too. I have a really good family law firm and they have been amazing so far.

 

[Ash]

You are perfectly entitled to have a girlfriend and go on holiday with her and the kids and it just makes the ex's argument look petty.

 

[Ash]

Thanks Ash. Yes I like the wording you suggested for my email response to get things going. I cam speak to my solicitor and get it water tight as possible and then send her the email from me first. It might look less aggressive and if she does agree then get it drawn up by solicitor.

I just checked her position statement again and it is a section 7. See below:

"THE MOTHER’S POSITION​

• The mother wants to promote a healthy relationship between the children and their father. However, the children are young and the father lives far away from the children’s schooling and leisure activities for there to be frequent overnight stays during the week, on term time. It is concerning to mother that father lacks insight as to the impact of such overnight stays, on the children and their needs and so mother seeks to be guided by CAFCASS and their recommendations.
• The Mother would request that the court make the following directions:
  • Cafcass to prepare a section 7 report confirming their recommendations for the parties moving forward.
  • DRA to be listed on the first open date after CAFCASS has sent their s.7 report.
  • Both parties to shall file position statements in advance of the DRA with the court and the other party, setting out their proposal for contact.
• Further submissions may be made after taking further instructions at court."

I find the above very strange and I'm a bit confused by it to be honest. I honestly question whether they (both her and her solicitor) know what they are doing and asking for.
PS. I live 7 miles away from their schools. Takes about 15 mins. CAFCASS already told me it wasn't a problem. I have a feeling that her position statement was prepared before cafcass report although sent after. Its honestly strange. I'm sure this will confuse the courts and judge too

It looks like her solicitor wrote the position statement, so yes they are asking the court for a section 7 report. This can only be to create delays as there are no reasons for one.

When is your hearing again and have you done a position statement? You need to do one as well. A blindingly logical reasonable one stating you only live 7 miles away and there is no issue with distance or transport. Cafcass have confirmed there are no welfare issues with you.

And don't fall into their trap of talking about "contact" - ex's solicitors love to use that word to make you seem like a lower class of parent! I just always use "parenting time with the children" or "the childrens time with me". Mention that Cafcass have completed their safeguarding, no welfare issues and they state they will no longer be involved. According to that position statement the Mother just seems to be raising issue of distance and after school activities (or is there more?)

Did the Cafcass letter make any actual recommendations or just leave it as you said - that the children enjoy spending time with both their parents? If so it sounds like they're saying - we're out of it - go to final hearing and battle it out and the Judge can decide.

Your ex and solicitor are just trying to cause delays and throw spanners in the works by asking for a Section 7 report. Which is a waste of court time and resources in the circumstances!

Your ex is probably a bit headless chicken - on the one hand she's begging you to drop it and wanting a consent order - on the other hand she's making allegations and asking for a section 7. Expect anything! Just keep going forwards with things. Be calm and polite in any dealings.

Be interesting to see what her response to your email is.

 

[SoulDad]

It looks like her solicitor wrote the position statement, so yes they are asking the court for a section 7 report. This can only be to create delays as there are no reasons for one.

When is your hearing again and have you done a position statement? You need to do one as well. A blindingly logical reasonable one stating you only live 7 miles away and there is no issue with distance or transport. Cafcass have confirmed there are no welfare issues with you.

And don't fall into their trap of talking about "contact" - ex's solicitors love to use that word to make you seem like a lower class of parent! I just always use "parenting time with the children" or "the childrens time with me".

It looks like her solicitor wrote the position statement, so yes they are asking the court for a section 7 report. This can only be to create delays as there are no reasons for one.

When is your hearing again and have you done a position statement? You need to do one as well. A blindingly logical reasonable one stating you only live 7 miles away and there is no issue with distance or transport. Cafcass have confirmed there are no welfare issues with you.

And don't fall into their trap of talking about "contact" - ex's solicitors love to use that word to make you seem like a lower class of parent! I just always use "parenting time with the children" or "the childrens time with me".

The hearing date hasn't been confirmed. Both our position statements were supposed to be submitted to courts on 22nd July and then the exchange was supposed to happen. Mine was submitted to courts before deadline but we didn't exchange with her solicitors as they had not completed it. This was only done last week. I had stated in my position statement distance to school etc. It really isn't far at all. In fact I've cycled there a few times.

 

[Ash]

Do you have a girlfriend by the way? You could suggest, in your position statement, that an order could include a recital saying neither parent will introduce the children to a new partner for the first three months. So it shows you're being child focused. Unless that messes up your holiday! If you do have a new partner, it could also be worth mentioning in the position statement as that makes your ex's arguments even less convincing and it's clear she's just creating obstacles since you got a new partner.

 

[SoulDad]

Did the Cafcass letter make any actual recommendations or just leave it as you said - that the children enjoy spending time with both their parents? If so it sounds like they're saying - we're out of it - go to final hearing and battle it out and the Judge can decide.

The only other thing they recommended is that we both attend SPIP. I already voluntary attended back in May so I have my certificate (it was one of my exhibits on my position statement to show I was being proactive to try and improve co-parenting)

 

[Ash]

So it's a straightforward case that should go to final hearing if no consent reached at first hearing. Do you have a hearing coming up? You mentioned position statement - have you already done one for next hearing?

 

[SoulDad]

So it's a straightforward case that should go to final hearing if no consent reached at first hearing. Do you have a hearing coming up? You mentioned position statement - have you already done one for next hearing?

So it's first hearing but we don't have a date yet. So, I've submitted position statement and we've had the cafcass call only and they've submitted their report to courts and us. We're now just waiting for a date for this first hearing. In the meantime I want her to agree to a consent order. Only then I'll drop the court order hearing. As you said, I'll wait for the consent order to be signed off before I do this

 

[SoulDad]

Do you have a girlfriend by the way? You could suggest, in your position statement, that an order could include a recital saying neither parent will introduce the children to a new partner for the first three months. So it shows you're being child focused. Unless that messes up your holiday! If you do have a new partner, it could also be worth mentioning in the position statement as that makes your ex's arguments even less convincing and it's clear she's just creating obstacles since you got a new partner.

Yes I mentioned in the position statement that she demanded reduced access the moment she thought I had a girlfriend. We have evidence too as she sent a letter almost stating that me having a girlfriend was emotionally traumatic to the kids and that my time with them to be reduced to alternate weekends.

 

[Ash]

Ok so to my mind it was a bit early to send a position statement when you haven't got the date of the next hearing yet - the idea is to update "the position" nearer the time of the hearing. But you can always send another one updating the position further, nearer the time of the hearing .

And I suspect that her "position statement" was a reaction to receiving yours. The court might see this as it is - you two fighting and arguing via court position statements! So hopefully things will settle down a bit before the next hearing.

Yes it would be good to have negotiations for a consent order. I doubt very much you will get anything agreed for a consent order unless you give way on a lot of things, which probably isn't a good idea. I may be wrong. But the main thing is - in your next position statement, you can show you have bent over backwards to try and resolve things amicably. That is what courts like to see to favour you.

 

[Hackedoff_dad]

IMHO This is why I did not use a Solicitor, all this is just now thrown into the washing machine to invent more cash flow to pay for some solicitors lifestyles, what seemed to be somethiong relatively simplish from a cafcass perspective, now it would seem that your case is going to be now dragging its arse like a sealion for months and months on end, at least you have contact with your child whilst the solicitors rinse your and your ex's back accounts, awful show

 

[Ash]

To some extent I would agree that I wouldn't be paying solicitors a lot of money to negotiate a consent order. But show that you have tried to negotiate. If she wants to pay a solicitor to send you a draft consent order (which almost certainly won't be in your favour!) then fine - but you can just decline and write an email yourself.

An attempt to show you've tried to reach consent is good - then you can say at next position statement - attempts have been made to negotiate and xyz is agreed but xyz is not agreed. Then it goes to final hearing.

 

[Ash]

I think actually you'd be best going to final hearing. She has no argument against midweek overnights. On the other hand that can lead to increased hostility which is why they always want parents to try and agree so there's less hostility - but not sure that works well anyway - as then they feel hostile that they were press ganged into agreeing something.

Be interested to know the response to your email to your ex!

 

[Dirge]

Noticed it's been about a year since anyone posted about CAFCASS experiences, so thought it maybe useful to give a heads up on the sort of questions CAFCASS are asking currently. It would be logical to assume that CAFCASS tailor the questions to each individual circumstances, but CAFCASS - who knows? Currently I have my children 3 nights a week on an informal basis. I am aware this is a pretty good deal, especially compared to the horror stories I'm reading about on this forum - hang tough guys, you have my respect. But I am wanting 50/50 custody.
Anyway, Just had my first telephone appointment with them in regard to upcoming CAO hearing, {no date set yet}.
Questions I was asked -
When did we separate?
How do me and stbx communicate - can I be contacted easily in emergencies? "We like to see child focused communication demonstrated"
What home am I providing/do the children have their own bedroom?
What hobbies/activities do I facilitate for the children?
Do I have any safe guarding concerns?
Is the current arrangement working?
What custody/arrangement am I looking for?
What is the wife's working pattern? CAFCASS were interested to hear when I thought the children would get quality time with the children.
Do we have any arrangements for holidays/special occasions?
How are the children doing at school?
Do I have any other children?
Am I in another relationship?

CAFCASS woman was polite, but I realised near the end of the interview she had made up her mind to recommend leaving arrangements as they were before the interview had started.

Hope this is of some use.

 

[Ash]

Cheers that is really helpful. It would be interesting to know if others have had similar questions. That is very different from how they used to do it. "Do you have any safeguarding concerns" is such a leading question. It almost encourages people to say - well there is this and this ......Next thing it's reported you've made allegations against the ex.

 

[Dirge]

Meant to say "when I thought the wife would get quality time with the children"

I'd read all the previous posts and was expecting DV/Harassment type questions, but there was none of that. Cafcass had obviously talked to stbx before me and between them they were pushing a "everything's fine as it is, no need to change anything" agenda. I naively didn't see that coming. Unless there are genuine safeguarding concerns, Cafcass should be promoting 50/50 rights for all.
Fortunately, regarding the safeguarding question, I kept my mouth shut. I do have concerns about the toe rag my stbx has taken up with, but thanks to the shared wisdom and experience on this forum I knew the folly of voicing these concerns. As others have said, mothers can hook up with anyone, Fathers are expected to retire to a hermit's cell, [with a bedroom for the children apparently].

 

[Yomi]

Hello guys,
I have my first interview with CAFCASS coming up in a few days. I have raised some safeguarding issues about ex-wife who is still not reachable.
I have read a lot of tips about keeping interviews child focused and to avoid talking bad about your ex who is known to have mental health difficulty and has threatened to commit suicide many times. She is known to behave unreasonably and has been arrested once for driving without a licence. She is also under investigation for involvement in employment fraud. As much as there is a lot going on with her, all I am interested in is to re-establish contact with the kids for their safety and well-being. How do I balance this during my interview?

 

[Ash]

I will have a think about this. A bit tied up at the moment.

 

[mva]

You say you have raised some safeguarding issues but this is your first caffcass interview. How have you raised and what’s been said.

 

[Willoughby]

I thought I'd add to this thread to say that - against my solicitor's advice - I made a formal complaint against CAFCASS for including statements that were not true in their report, and for including a biased point of view (or maternal-centred approach) as well as ignoring or rejecting my concerns out of hand. I had an interview with them in December and followed it up with an email summarising the points. I chased them this week and they have promised to send an email with the outcome of their deliberations on Monday. In my complaint letter I asked for three things:

• For CAFCASS to review my complaint submission and take a reflective approach with the CAFCASS adviser involved to ensure that they understand the impact of their actions so that they do not repeat any errors of judgement in in future.
• A communication from CAFCASS that the issues in the Section 7 report were not appropriate or accurate. It was the single most important document in over a year of proceedings and contained errors which will likely have impacted the Court’s judgement. In addition, I believe that my daughter will be given this report in time by her mother (due to her behaviour to date of alienating my daughter from me), to reinforce that alienation, and it is very important to me that the untruths in it do not stand unchallenged.
• That I would be more than willing to work with CAFCASS to help develop constructive input to, for example, any review processes or learning materials for the future.

I'll keep this thread posted.