Am I being manipulated???

[Lifeohlife]

So, I wonder if any men have been through similar.

My wife of 17 years, 5 kids, 37, left me as she was in a rut in life and "done" 6 months ago. Long story short, it made me suicidal.

She got with a 50 year old man within about a week after splitting (yes I get it they were probably together before). All happy families and presumably has been for 6 months as my 5 kids and his kids have all integrated etc etc despite the fact she lives with her mum. I have the kids 5050. It feels like her new family is more important than her own kids.

In the last month or so, although she is blocked everywhere, she's been viewing my tiktok profile 4 or 5 times per day. As well as the profile of a woman I'm seeing which us annoying her.

Some people say it's a sign she's not over me, trying to control me or manipulate me. Seems weird it's almost at the 6 month phase with this old man.

Anyone else been through similar?

I suppose I just want a chat

 

[ditata]

I guess you can look at this a few ways...

1. As others have pointed out, she's not over you. But if that were the case, surely she would be contacting you in a more direct way to test the waters on reconciliation?
   
   
2. She's trying to control and manipulate you by viewing your TikTok profile. I'm not really sure how that would constitute manipulating or controlling, aside from her just knowing you'll see she's looked but you could easily block her and then that'd put an end to that.
   
   
3. She's checking in on you? Maybe, despite what's happened she's just checking in on you to see that you're not posting anything that indicates you're in a really bad place or something like that, if you were married for 17 years, you're the father of her children then she likely still cares for your well being on some level I would think.
   
   
4. She's seeing who your new partner is in order to see who her kids are potentially going to be around? As a parent I would say thats a pretty normal thing to do and doesn't necessarily mean she's stalking or harassing that person, occasionally looking on a profile to see if there is sign of them having being introduced to the children or to see what kind of person they are is pretty normal - I think.
   
   
5. Something else like one or some of the kids are taking her phone and looking to see what you're up to?
   
   With these sorts of things, I've usually found that whatever you're gut instinct is telling you is usually what it is, if it bothers you so much block her, if it doesn't then let her look for whatever reason she's looking, the best route forward is to live you're life for your own reasons and motivations so that you're happy, progressing not doing things for other peoples benefit - i.e playing up to her looking on your profile.
   
   Sorry no one replied sooner, I hope you're doing well!