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Partner moving in - anything I should prepare for?

Smiffy

Smiffy

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So now lockdown is lifted my partner of a year is moving in with me. A bit nervous about how ex will react even though kids have met partner a few times. Should I tell her or just wait for her to find out?
 
I'd just go ahead. It depends what communication is like with your ex really. Out of courtesy you could drop her a text or email to say - just to let you know, out of courtesy, that partner will be moving in, the kids already know her, so no change. But if you think she'll make a major drama to the point of refusing contact then maybe don't tell her. She'll then find out from the kids though and might react even stronger then.

Difficult.
 
What has your ex been like to date and do you have anything formal in place re contact.

I've not had this experience but understand this is one of the trigger points so to speak for things to become a bit stained.

Best of luck.
 
Ok so now some problems started. Long email from my ex dictating rules. Says my partner must never do any pick ups or drop offs. The children have been complaining they are not given enough to eat. And she's booking them into a class on Saturday mornings. Not sure what to do - should I just ignore? Except I need to say whether I agree to the Saturday mornings. Normally they come after school on Friday, so assume I can just say - I'll take them if I don't have anything else planned. And ignore the rest.
 
I think you acknowledge the email but agree with nothing. State that you will continue as you always have. Presumably your new partner has no intention of doing pick ups and drop offs. If this continues tell her you want to do mediation.

Just don't react to her behaviour.
 
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Also be wary of not doing the school pick up Friday as she might start saying they don't want to come at weekends.
 
Roblox said:
I think you acknowledge the email but agree with nothing. State that you will continue as you always have. Presumably your new partner has no intention of doing pick ups and drop offs. If this continues tell her you want to do mediation.

Just don't react to her behaviour.
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Good advice there. I can't remember - do you have a court order, or is it just informal?
 
Cheers. I just replied fine to the class on Saturday mornings and picked them up on the Friday as usual and ignored the rest. Just kind of letting the dust settle. Maybe in time she'll get used to the idea but playing it low key for now. Kids are still coming. They didn't really want to go out on Sat am though so I'll see how that goes. It's informal so I'm making sure all my communications are reasonable and brief in case I end up in court at some point.
 
Hi @Smiffy ,

Just poking about the forum seeing if I can pickup from other dads experiences.

How did things go after the introduction of your partner, did the dust stay settled, did the ex keep poking at you here and there?

How old are the kids, out of interest what ha the relationship been like with your partner?

It's always a big concern when we think about moving on, how will the kids react!
 
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