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need some advice

J

jpwilder

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Hi all,

My son has not long turned 17 and in his first year at college. last October I contacted his college to ask what course he was doing and for how long (for CMS review). They said he was enrolled for a wood working course and also he will be retaking Maths and English at GCSE level.

The wood working course he is doing is part of his apprenticeship. I know this from speaking with my son direct, I try not to involve him as I do not want our relationship to breakdown, I have not spoken with his mum in over 2 years now.

This is the part that I think is not quite right..........

My son is paid quite well from his employer and works 7am till 4.30pm 4 days a week. He sometimes works on a Saturday for the same company for extra money. He has not done any of the Maths or English course only the 1 day a week wood working.

While I am happy he is out there earning a wage I feel that someone is playing games with claiming child benefit which then keeps the CMS payments coming from me.

I have always paid for him without fail and will keep doing so but would like some advice on whether I should be paying it or not.

Thank you
 
Hi Kyle,

Thank you for the link. I have seen this before which leads me to believe the ex is committing fraud as he is being paid and also working more than 24 hrs a week.

I just feel slightly torn on what to do as I do not want this to affect my relationship with my son or for him to get into any trouble. At the same time though I don't like being taken for a mug by his mother. If I report her do I need to obtain proof he is earning or not been to college?

I tried to ring cms on many occasions but can never get through. The portal is not much use either I find.

Thanks
 
Will the GCSE retakes be full-time (more than an average of 12 hours a week)? If not It doesn't appear that qualifies as Approved Education.

Approved Training should be unpaid, and if his woodworking apprenticeship is an approved Foundation Apprenticeship that should be the case.

If a child leaves school and gets a job, CMS payments should stop in the September after they left school. If a child is still in education and is studying at least 12 hours a week towards A-Levels, for example, (Approved Education) payments should continue and may continue until the child is 19 years old.

However, if a child over the age of 16 is not taking a higher education course, the payments may be discontinued. If your son's studying doesn't meet the criteria for Approved Education, it may be that the obligation to pay maintenance has already ended.

If your son no longer depends on the financial support of his mother, then it would be questionable whether she would be entitled to receive child maintenance payments.

You need to contact the CMS to put the matter to them. The best way to avoid creating any conflict with your son or ex is simply to keep this matter to yourself until you know exactly where you stand. But you shouldn't be paying maintenance to your ex to help her support your son as the resident parent if your son is now maintaining himself.

Keep trying the phone. But I have discovered in the past they are sometimes better at responding via the post. It wouldn't hurt to get it in writing.

https://www.gov.uk/child-maintenance-service/contact
 
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The gcse's would of put him into 12 or more a week but since September he has not done any of it. When I ask him how he's getting on he is very vague about it as if his mother has told him what to say or he knows the truth but doesn't want to get involved. Recently he said he's now going to do the re-takes next year which just shows his mum is playing the system. I know deep down he's not interested In the re-take's he just wants to work and earn money.


Thank you for your advice though Kyle. I will try the letter route with as much info as possible as see where it goes.

Worst case scenario I still have to pay for a couple of years but just grates on me funding someone else's lifestyle.
 
Jp....don't put too much in writing to cms.

Simply say you have tried to contact them on numerous occasions and you now wish for them to make contact with you. Without telling them this (above) it is your marker in the sand. Give them all available means to make contact with you.

Once that has happened, you can then explain the issues.

Good luck and get back here afterwards, ok?

SS.
 
jpwilder said:
I will try the letter route with as much info as possible as see where it goes.

Worst case scenario I still have to pay for a couple of years but just grates on me funding someone else's lifestyle.
Click to expand...

StayStrong is right!

What I meant was, ask them the question you would of asked over the phone but in a letter. Don't say anything other than you would like to inquire as to whether your payments should continue. Keep things brief and professional though.
 
If your son is earning, presumably he is paying national insurance and being taxed. The CMS have direct access to tax records so will be able to see he is earning and how much.

Personally I would persist in trying to get through on the phone, explain the situation. I have actually found them very helpful before - when you're just asking for advice and information. They may say they will reassess.

Yes it does seem your ex is "keeping a foot in the door" with Child Benefits/CM by these ongoing retakes that haven't materialised. Your son probably doesn't want to say anything because he a) doesn't want to lie and b) as you say doesn't want to be caught in the middle of this.
 
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