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Is this what all us fathers face?

MDad

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Hi I am the father of 3 gorgeous little boys who are aged 8, 5 and 4.

Since December 12 2018 I have had a case in the family court in Scotland.

Over the course of this time all of my children have sustained black eyes, one had his head split open twice, burst open fingers, burnt toes, bite marks, bruised temple, electrocuted and more.

The finals straw was in August of 2021 when my youngest boy told me that his mums partner had asked him to touch his Willie and he will get him crisps on the way to school. I refused to return my boys, my ex used her custodial rights to remove them from school to which the head teacher agreed even this I was showing her the evidence of abuse she just shook her head and said they have to be with their mum.

I presented at court 9 days later where I was specifically told by the sheriff that he will put me in jail if I keep the children again without someone telling me to.

I was given access back to my boys and on the same day that decision was made I picked them up from school. As soon as I seen my children they all told me how theirs mums partner dragged my oldest boy up the stairs with his arm which again caused bruising. I reported this to police and social work but again they said I was making all of these allegations up.

I was told from social workers that I am subjecting my children to too many professionals and that this is not good for them.

The children were then placed on the child protection register as myself being the perpetrator! As this meeting all the members refused to acknowledge that the social work records and reports are extremely omitted and does not even contain the information about my children sucking their own brothers private parts while in their mothers care!

Instead I was degraded and accused of being a liar!

Soo.. after being mentally tortured by services since December 2018 and given that this man can abuse my children with zero accountability I choose to react!

On Monday 10th January 2022 I received a phone call from a Manger within my local council who was extremely rude and had no response to my valid facts. The phone call turned very sour when I said you will all be held accountable, I was told to choose my next words very carefully. I ended the phone call.

On Wednesday 12th I received another call from another Manager within Falkirk Council who apologised for her colleague and asked how I can let social work learn to build my trust again, I accepted and said I am and have been more than willing to work with social services but this is not received in return.

On Thursday 13th I received a phone call from my childrens social worker, they were very careful on what they said and the phone call seemed ok, what I did take away from this call tho was that they pretended to be unaware of a child welfare report being carried out by the court on Friday 14th, she seemed annoyed that they were coming to speak with me first.

On Friday 14 at 8:30 am I dropped my boys off at breakfast club, I was approached by the beasty fucker that has been abusing my children in the school playground, it was in the walkway of the school entrance so no longer than an average sized hallway, I was next to the teacher when he approached me. His nose was literally touching my nose when he asked if I want to kiss him. I ignored his behaviour and turned my head to ask the teacher if she is going to allow this for her to then turn her head away as if to allow it to continue. I refused to engage and remained calm and courteous and proceeded to squeeze by and leave the school playground. As I was leaving he shouted that he will give my kids a kiss goodnight for me.

I got in my car and drove away, in this split second I thought I should go back and report him like I have done before, as I was approaching the school he was walking down the pavement at the side of the road. He gave me the fingers and then proceeded to what I assumed was to step in front of my vehicle so I hit him with it. He went flying over the roof off the car and by the time I was out to get him he got up and run away.

I have not seen my children since!

My children were no where present during this yet 3 little boys who were injured on a weekly basis while in their mothers care has now never seen the only person who was actually trying to help them!!

The story continues from there aswell, not only am I being gaslight by services they are now denying abuse occurred!!

I’ve literally had social work ask me over 8 times if I want supervised contact to which I refused. When I finally did accept they then refused the contact by saying they will let the court decide!

The world is fucked up and this cannot be the normal practice of child protection. I have done nothing to my boys and yet I am being punished for what?

So I’m in court this Friday 27th may, at the last hearing the sheriff made an order for a CPS to make a mental health report on myself, they would like a report from my CPS to check my mental health. The thing here is that I have zero mental health issues and my CPS said she cannot make a report because it’s not her job and that it would be a psychiatric nurse or doctor who would do this. If she were to refer me to them they would not accept the referral based on the FACT that I have no issues to my mental health.

This means that come Friday 27th there is no report which means the sheriff cannot make a decision on whether or not I can have my access back.

In other words… the nurse can break a court order and not comply. My ex can keep our boys away from me which is breaking a court order and it is also contempt of court and the sheriff will do nothing.

If I dare keep my children from abuse they will put me in the jail!!

Seems like something is not right here and my children and myself are the only ones suffering!!

Maybe it’s because my sister was killed by someone in a public media case, they are scared that this will bring them bad press!

All I know is I will never ever give up for those little guys and every professional involved will be held accountable wether that be in the court or by public exposure.

My story is entirely true and I have all the evidence yet the court and social services seem to not want me to have a trial/proof hearing

Stay strong guys because your children need you.
 
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Hi. I've edited your post to remove real names. We also ask people not to use their real names as their username, so I'll message you to see what you want to change it to.

I have to say I found it upsetting to hear about your children being injured. And that social services didn't do anything. Advice is usually to keep putting things in writing to them each time there is an incident, because then the written reports build up and, I believe, after 5 or 6 written reports, they have to take it seriously. I find it hard to believe they didn't look into such serious allegations. The other recourse is a) via the school - the school have a duty to report any signs of abuse to social services and have them investigate. If they have not seen anything then writing to them saying you have concerns and asking them to keep an eye on your children also means they have a duty to do so as well. Basically, put everything in writing. Also you can report abuse concerns anonymously via the NSPCC (you can in England, I assume it's the same, or something similar, in Scotland).

Any signs of anger though, and people could see you as the aggressor, not your children. Have a look at Vincent McGovern's book - I'll link it - the kindle version is not expensive at £5.99. He has been through a lot of this (not abuse of his children but of himself via false allegations) and he has taken on social services even to ombudsman level - it is worth reading and an easy read.

However frustrated and angry you feel, don't show it to the professionals or they'll just label you as aggressive (aggressive man = abuser to them).

 
Hi. I've edited your post to remove real names. We also ask people not to use their real names as their username, so I'll message you to see what you want to change it to.

I have to say I found it upsetting to hear about your children being injured. And that social services didn't do anything. Advice is usually to keep putting things in writing to them each time there is an incident, because then the written reports build up and, I believe, after 5 or 6 written reports, they have to take it seriously. I find it hard to believe they didn't look into such serious allegations. The other recourse is a) via the school - the school have a duty to report any signs of abuse to social services and have them investigate. If they have not seen anything then writing to them saying you have concerns and asking them to keep an eye on your children also means they have a duty to do so as well. Basically, put everything in writing. Also you can report abuse concerns anonymously via the NSPCC (you can in England, I assume it's the same, or something similar, in Scotland).

Any signs of anger though, and people could see you as the aggressor, not your children. Have a look at Vincent McGovern's book - I'll link it - the kindle version is not expensive at £5.99. He has been through a lot of this (not abuse of his children but of himself via false allegations) and he has taken on social services even to ombudsman level - it is worth reading and an easy read.

However frustrated and angry you feel, don't show it to the professionals or they'll just label you as aggressive (aggressive man = abuser to them).

Thanks for your response and I apologise for the names I just jumped right in feet first.

Social services have over 78 concerns raised in th reports and not 1 of them has been proven fact. all 78 are entirely malicious according to social services.

I have kept a full history since December 2018.

The school is just as corrupt, the head teacher is out of work friends with my childrens social worker. To be even more clearer on the schools role in this:

In the social work report it stated that other children within the school were sucking their brothers private parts. When I asked the school if this was correct they said it was not correct, but everything else was. Social work confirmed that this was incorrect, both had complaints submitted and both said this was not correct. Fast forward 3 months and low and behold social services are now telling the sheriff that there was other children involved sexually in the school but it did not concern my children so they did not investigate. So after formally denying this they now say it is true.

I fully understand about being aggressive and having lived with an abuser for 5 years I know first hand how they act and portray themselves.

What option do we actually have when no one helps? When I have over 20 pictures of abuse that is missing from records etc..

Are all the courts corrupt/biased to men? I really do not know what to do anymore. Come Friday they are going to put it off another 4 weeks and I feel as tho I am at my last tether and i may do something silly to this man.

This story sound extreme and may be hard to believe but I can show you anytime you wish all the evidence and nothing I am saying is a lie. It’s sooo draining.

The contempt of court for my ex keeping the children has also been with the same sheriff since February and according to my lawyer he will deal with it all at the same time… but like when? So much for the children being the main concern for the courts.

Thank you so much for your reply and I will give that book a look at. I find reading others stories upsetting and have entirely focused on learning the law in family matters which none of them seem to be following.

Thanks
 
Don't do anything silly. Your level of intelligence is enough to get a feel for the quality of father your boys get. Don't let evil win. Don't let it make you the monster. Focus all of that powerful emotion on getting expert with the system and with the procedures and processes and maintain an intellectual war of attrition for the truth until you're rid of its enemies. So many of us are in this fight too. But it has to be fought smart. With our wits not our fists or we fail ourselves and our kids.

Never give up is the mantra.
 
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