hi all (october 2020)
i have for months and months been reading and re reading and then READING AGAIN posts and stories on here and i cannot begin to tell you how much of a reassurance it has been to hear there are other fathers out there in similar situations.
abit about my case:
i left my wife who is the usual controlling, narcissist, always plays the victim, dominant feminist. we have two children together 4 and a 2 year old and they are my absolute world. i left my wife because i could not and would not want to be with such a negative horrible woman who always brought me down and believed she was a victim. i did not want my children to grow up thinking thats ok and for their father to be constantly be belittled, constantly sworn at infront of the children enough was enough. i left and somemonths later i found the love of my life and obviously this was a huge issue for my ex. anyways i continued to see my children and have them overnight every bi weekly this i had to fight for. their mother has played the abuse card how she suffered domestic violence from myself and my family (aint going to lie i would love to have smashed that old goats teeth in after the disgusting things shes accused me of but the truth is ive never laid a finger on her and the universe has served her some humble pie now).
i applied to court after mediation brokedown. ex claimed the mediator was impartial and that she was not being listened to....more victim card here. i then submitted my C100 to courts for a 50/50 custody and also a change of school for the children. this is when things took a new twist. she got social workers involved the day i submitted my court application and claimed my daughter said i slapped her. ex also claimed domestic abuse and that i passed out naked infront of my daughter and she did not know if i had done something with her......just writing that makes me still feel so angry that a mother could accuse a father of such a disgusting untrue act for her own selfish gains. Cafcass became involved and i was interviewed. obviously there was nothing for me to worry about and i openly and fully engaged with them. they had to submit a safeguarding letter to the courts before the first hearing with their findings and to say the report was absolutely glowing in my favour is an understatement. Cafcass had advised there was no risk what so ever to the children having observed them in my home and that the animosity was between the parents. Cafcass stated in the report that there was no further need for them to be involved and invited the courts to decide on the outcome. Cafcass also stated the children love spending time with both parents and the contact with the father needs to continue.
court hearing ex solicitor tried to say the report needs to be done again for some reason and the FEMALE judge shot the solicitor down and said "no the report has already been done theres no need to waste time the professional body cafcass have already stated there is no risk to the children in the care of both parents so theres no further reason for a further report to be done. further more cafcass in their report have stated there is no need for a fact finding report to be done in this instance." ex solicitor then claimed the cafcass officer had emailed the ex as the cafcass officer believed she was a victim of domestic violence and that this email may have not been seen by cafcass which could have changed the report. i advised the judge i have never been charged formally for any offence of violence and that the ex claims are fabricated lies and if she wanted to she could go to the police for them to investigate and that it cannot be considered in this case. the judge agreed fully and also advised the solicitor the same cafcass officer they said had emailed the ex was the same officer who has done the report and stated theres no abuse to the children.
the judge overrulled all allegations and has set a date for a final hearing which i am over the moon about. it will mean evidence will now be submitted as to why the school move is in the best interest of the children and that is no issues for me i know i am going to get this school moved because its better for the children no issues there. the judge has already entertained the idea of me getting 50/50 which was stated at the start of the process. but this is the cream on the cake, at the end of the hearing the judge praised me for wanting to be in the childrens lives and its lovely to see that i enjoy spending time with them and obvious to see how devoted to the children i am from the reports they received and from speaking to me!!!!! i am not going to lye this in it self was a blessing to hear.
although nothing has been settled yet im feeling over the moon that her lies and deception of being a self proclaimed victim is not fooling the courts. i wanted to share my stories to give people the belief that the truth will always prevail.
keep the faith believe in what you are doing and believe in the love you have for your children. this is not about hurting my ex its about my rights as a father and no one stopping me seing and spending as much time as i can with my two children. the marriage may have broke down but thats not the fault of the children and they have a right to have both parents in their lives.
stay positive believe in the universe what will be will be. i shal update my final hearing in february
i have for months and months been reading and re reading and then READING AGAIN posts and stories on here and i cannot begin to tell you how much of a reassurance it has been to hear there are other fathers out there in similar situations.
abit about my case:
i left my wife who is the usual controlling, narcissist, always plays the victim, dominant feminist. we have two children together 4 and a 2 year old and they are my absolute world. i left my wife because i could not and would not want to be with such a negative horrible woman who always brought me down and believed she was a victim. i did not want my children to grow up thinking thats ok and for their father to be constantly be belittled, constantly sworn at infront of the children enough was enough. i left and somemonths later i found the love of my life and obviously this was a huge issue for my ex. anyways i continued to see my children and have them overnight every bi weekly this i had to fight for. their mother has played the abuse card how she suffered domestic violence from myself and my family (aint going to lie i would love to have smashed that old goats teeth in after the disgusting things shes accused me of but the truth is ive never laid a finger on her and the universe has served her some humble pie now).
i applied to court after mediation brokedown. ex claimed the mediator was impartial and that she was not being listened to....more victim card here. i then submitted my C100 to courts for a 50/50 custody and also a change of school for the children. this is when things took a new twist. she got social workers involved the day i submitted my court application and claimed my daughter said i slapped her. ex also claimed domestic abuse and that i passed out naked infront of my daughter and she did not know if i had done something with her......just writing that makes me still feel so angry that a mother could accuse a father of such a disgusting untrue act for her own selfish gains. Cafcass became involved and i was interviewed. obviously there was nothing for me to worry about and i openly and fully engaged with them. they had to submit a safeguarding letter to the courts before the first hearing with their findings and to say the report was absolutely glowing in my favour is an understatement. Cafcass had advised there was no risk what so ever to the children having observed them in my home and that the animosity was between the parents. Cafcass stated in the report that there was no further need for them to be involved and invited the courts to decide on the outcome. Cafcass also stated the children love spending time with both parents and the contact with the father needs to continue.
court hearing ex solicitor tried to say the report needs to be done again for some reason and the FEMALE judge shot the solicitor down and said "no the report has already been done theres no need to waste time the professional body cafcass have already stated there is no risk to the children in the care of both parents so theres no further reason for a further report to be done. further more cafcass in their report have stated there is no need for a fact finding report to be done in this instance." ex solicitor then claimed the cafcass officer had emailed the ex as the cafcass officer believed she was a victim of domestic violence and that this email may have not been seen by cafcass which could have changed the report. i advised the judge i have never been charged formally for any offence of violence and that the ex claims are fabricated lies and if she wanted to she could go to the police for them to investigate and that it cannot be considered in this case. the judge agreed fully and also advised the solicitor the same cafcass officer they said had emailed the ex was the same officer who has done the report and stated theres no abuse to the children.
the judge overrulled all allegations and has set a date for a final hearing which i am over the moon about. it will mean evidence will now be submitted as to why the school move is in the best interest of the children and that is no issues for me i know i am going to get this school moved because its better for the children no issues there. the judge has already entertained the idea of me getting 50/50 which was stated at the start of the process. but this is the cream on the cake, at the end of the hearing the judge praised me for wanting to be in the childrens lives and its lovely to see that i enjoy spending time with them and obvious to see how devoted to the children i am from the reports they received and from speaking to me!!!!! i am not going to lye this in it self was a blessing to hear.
although nothing has been settled yet im feeling over the moon that her lies and deception of being a self proclaimed victim is not fooling the courts. i wanted to share my stories to give people the belief that the truth will always prevail.
keep the faith believe in what you are doing and believe in the love you have for your children. this is not about hurting my ex its about my rights as a father and no one stopping me seing and spending as much time as i can with my two children. the marriage may have broke down but thats not the fault of the children and they have a right to have both parents in their lives.
stay positive believe in the universe what will be will be. i shal update my final hearing in february
And believe me, I needed it!!